Monday, March 28, 2005

In an attempt to lift the mood from Saturday's mini-post here is more spring break stuff!!!

Steve booted from Pleasure Island - So Steve who had been using his older brother's ID in order to be able to drink, gave one ID that did not match the name on his pass to get in. Result: Steve is kicked out, ID taken, and told not to come back that night...but he did anyway!
The Maine murderer - So en route down to Florida a little pickup truck has 2 large garbage bags sitting in the trunk. As his license plate was from Maine, we assumed they were hacked up people he murdered.
El Cheapo - The name of a gas station down south that had a logo of a mule kicking high prices. It was classic.
Murph last in line - At Disney World, getting in line for all of the rides, Murph was always last in line, because he "didn't like to be crowded and pushed". However, when it was time to get on the ferry going back to the parking lot, he was ahead of all of us...even though he was going to get on the ferry before the person who had the car and eventually had to wait for us anyway.
Alcohol Buckets - Pleasure Island gave us one of the great inventions of our day...for about 9 dollars you could get a nice tropical drink in a nice large plastic bucket. But the real treat was the ability to refill these with pretty much any drink you wanted for anywhere from 5-7 bucks depending on the bartender. Led to much drunkenness for all.
Anne/Egg references - After watching AD (arrested development) the Sunday night on break...I made it a point to point out girls that had forgettable faces and refer to them as Egg. If you don't watch AD this whole thing will probably not make any sense at all.
Murph searches for candy - So while waiting for people to meet us at Pleasure Island, Murph had a huge candy craving. He left our group dissappearing for quite a while. We finally see him over by the information place debating whether or not to ask where he can score some candy. He eventually came back to us candyless.
Pat's spine biting - So we're chillin the pool just chattin and relaxing, when Pat swims under me, Tim, and John and bites Steve in the spine.
Carousel Horsies! - After a guy workin on the ride made a Pulp Fiction reference to me (I was wearing a Big Kahuna Burger shirt), we all got on the carousel for a nice ride. Murph taught me how to properly ride a horse. He did not however laugh uncontrollably for no reason though.
Team Chowder Fork Dominance - After playing a few games of setback with no teams, we teamed off with me and John being Team Chowder Fork, mocking Steve's earlier use of a fork to eat clam chowder. Although attempts to cheat were made, they were unsuccessful (talking about sports means you have good cards!). We did however win all 3 games, with the last 2 being complete blowouts.
MASH - Remember that game where you would see who you're gonna marry, what car you drive, where you live, etc? Well Heather and Julia decided to go old school and bust it out the last night in Florida while we were sittin around the apartment. I'm pretty sure Heather and Steve ended up having 100 children or something like that.
Teabagging - So on the subject of Steve and genitals...a game of down the river eventually left Steve passed out on the floor. Pat decides to put his balls on Steve's head, and we took a picture. For Steve's sake, said picture has not been posted with the rest, but is available by request.
17 year olds - First night in Pleasure Island and we're in some rock-type club. Note: all clubs in Pleasure Island are supposed to be at least 18+. So me and John are chillin and these girls call us over. I wouldn't say they were hot, but they weren't bad. So there was a little where you from? are you on break? stuff. So I ask how old they are, to which they reply 17. Conversation kinda died down and it got a bit awkward. We stood around uncomfortably for a few until they left.
Hodgie Podgie - Yes, to all my ex Norwalk band members, this is the game that I would want to play constantly back in high school. It's basically a game of making a continuous sentence with each person giving a new word in rhythm with clapping. They usually end up being ridiculous and often sexual in nature. Me and John played this in the taxi to Pleasure Island, annoying people I'm sure.
Pants off at Sea World (almost) - We're driving through Florida and we go by Sea World. Remembering Champ's (Anchorman reference) love of taking his pants off at Sea World, I have a strong desire to take my pants off in front of the sign and take a picture. Sad to say, it never actually went down.
Bring it on Everest - If anyone watched ESPN throughout that week, you probably saw a preview for TILT, guest starring Phil Helmuth. Over and over again, we'd hear Bring it on Everest being said by Phil as each commercial kept it in our heads. We then concluded (without watchin the show) that Everest later shoots Phil Helmuth.
Steve Farted - My love of signs led to many shenanigans on the way back home from Florida. Actually during the Uconn game vs. Syracuse, Steve did the U-C-O-N-N thing Red does at the games. During one game a guy behind him held up a "Farted" sign with an arrow pointing at Red. So during the Uconn game I made a sign like that for Steve. The real hilarity ensued on the trip home though when we would hold it up pointing to Steve so that other cars would see and laugh at the sign.
Faggy Bartender -So me and Julia are in this club and we go to get drinks. The gay bartender makes our drinks and puts in a little light up stirred thing and says "you've been turned on by a fag in Orlando". It made me quite uncomfortable.
8-Trax - Kick ass 70s/80s club in Pleasure Island. Such great events include: Shaun actually dancing, me, Julia, Heather, Steve and Tuba bustin some moves, a dance-off between me and John (it was a tie), and many many people at least in their 40s, most of which sketchy old guys eyeing the younger girls on the dance floor.
The Final Countdown/Don't Stop Believin - On the way down, the two respective cars had songs play whenever we entered a new state. Our car played The Final Countdown, while the other car played Don't Stop Believin. The cars played them on the way back as well, although we did manage to miss a few states with Don't Stop Believin. Long live Europe and Journey!
Asterick - As a result of being threatened of cheating in setback, Rachel decides to put an asterick...yes an asterick next to our win.
No alcohol on the train - Getting onto a little train ride that goes across Disney, one of the guys makes a joke about alcohol being in the frozen lemonades a few of us got. Then being a complete dick, he doesn't allow them to be brought on the train. He was hated.
Chris loves Morgan - Chris decided to try and push Murph's buttons by constantly making remarks about getting with Murph's sister. Murph later had to defend his sister's honor in a game of miniature golf, which he actually won. What a good brother.

I feel like leaving the readers in suspense for the rest. There's really not that many left. But I purposely left out the rest of the velociraptor stuff for the last post cuz you gotta save the best for last right? PEACE!

Saturday, March 26, 2005

I really suck at life...a lot.

Friday, March 18, 2005

More spring break ish...

Oh by the way if these are dumb and shit and it would be a waste of time to put the rest of these up let me know.

The Reverse Request Line - So on the way down to Florida I came up with the genius idea of calling random people up and asking them what song we should listen to. One of the best ideas I've ever had.
John's Cell Phone - So apparently John's phone often allows him to not hear whoever is on the other line. This lead to him hitting his phone repeatedly. I would call him several times to make plans for the day and would hear him beat upon his phone. It made me laugh.
UCONN...HUSKIES!!! - So we're about to leave the Magic Kingdom and we're walking by Cinderella's castle, when we randomly hear something similar to our Uconn Huskies chant thing. So we join in on the chant of our fellow Husky fans, and there was much rejoicing.
Rachel runs into the door - So we're playing a rousing game of setback on the porch (me and John are kicking a ridiculous amount of ass), and Rachel (a little intoxicated) goes inside to get a phone book I believe. So on her way back out, she forgets theres a sliding door to get out to the porch and runs smack into it. (I like parentheses)
Double Shot of Depression - So the night before we're leaving Florida, Uconn loses to Syracuse. So we have the loss of Uconn as well as packing up all our things to go back home, or as John called it, a "double shot of depression".
Continental Breakfast - Most ghetto continental breakfast in our Days Inn. They had bread slices that were packaged in plastic, fig newtons, half-assed bagels, and cereal. The packaged bread made me stray from said breakfast, but Murph would wake up early every day and get breakfast, take about 20 fig newtons, and then go back to bed.
"With what, my tooth?" - Random stop for gas on the way home from Florida, and John is on the phone. He says to me "turn it down" referring to the music playing in the car via my ipod which is sitting in the front seat, and both of us sitting in the back. So I respond, "With what, my tooth?". It was very funny at the time.
100000 cops on the highway - So on the way down to Florida, and I think driving through the D.C. area and there are cops like whoa all over the place, police searching for shit, a guy in cuffs on the ground, a police helicopter above us, it was nuts. We all assumed they were looking for Steve because he's an ethnic.
Shaun's birthday - At Disney, Shaun got an "It's my birthday" pin to wear so that all the Disney employees would wish him a happy birthday when we would go on rides. It never got old.
John's Hotness Scale - So John made a scale of who was the hottest of us guys and apparently he ranked Murph #1. I was ranked like 5 or some shit to which I was not pleased. Chris was puzzled by the hotness scale.
99 Knicks Resurrected - We played basketball some day and had a 2 on 2 tournament, with Rachel-Pat, Tim-Steve, Murph-Chris, and Me-John. So me and John took on the underdog role, similar to the 99 Knicks and played a tough game, me as Spree, him as Houston, and Shaun as coach Jeff Van Gundy. Despite an early 1-0 lead, we lost 5-2 to team bad chemistry (Murph-Chris).
German U-Boats - So at Disney you have to take the ferry to get from the parking areas to the park, so we're on the ferry and I decide they should have the ferry over be like a real ride. My idea was to have the ferry be torpedoed by German U-boats. It would make the normally uninteresting ferry ride an exciting adventure!
Best friend hats - Me and Steve bought matching hats (kind of like cowboy hats) from the Pirates of the Carribean gift shop. It was later decided by me that if you have matching hats with someone you must be best friends. A later idea was to have BEST written on one hat, and FRIENDS written on the other, but that idea has yet to be put into action.
Jewish Steve? - Before we left for Florida, mom made us all a nice pasta dinner. This was the first time she met Steve and first asked if he was Italian. Note: he is Brazilian. When he replied no, she then followed up by asking Steve if he was Jewish. Much laughter was the result.
"Sorry, your photo has been washed away" - Night time at Disney and we go on Splash Mountain one more time, only me, Shaun, Tim, Murph, Chris, and John remain. So for the picture they take when you're on the ride we decide to put our shirts over our heads and expose our bare chests. To GREAT dissapointment we go to look at the picture, and find a message that reads: "Sorry your photo has been washed away". Very sad for the boys. I guess Disney World fears male nipples.
7 foot (wo)man? - First night at Pleasure Island and a woman of about 7 feet tall walks by us. Quite possible she was a shemale...we weren't sure. It was later found out that someone saw a midget a little bit earlier, making it even funnier.
Mean Girls - Funny ass movie, if you haven't seen it I recommend it. We watched it the night it rained and we all drank. Best part of the movie involves a character named Glen Coco, who receives 4 candy canes. "You go Glen Coco".
Down the river Steve - Drinking game the night it rained and we stayed in the room drinking. Everyone decided to give drinks to Steve, making him have several beers probably within half an hour. I felt bad, but continued to make him drink anyway.
Pirate's Cove - Intense mini golf game with Murph ending up beating me by 2 at the end to win the event. I did manage to get 2 holes-in-ones. Also, Tim rallied at the end to end up tying for last place with Shaun. Chris finished third. I love pirates.
Honk if you like raptors - Sitting in traffic in Florida we made some random signs, one of which was "Honk if you like raptors". I was on pretty much 0 sleep so it was hilarious to me. This led to much more raptor jokes, which will surely make an appearance in a future blog entry.
Pants off, pool time - Coming back quite drunk from Pleasure Island, me, Tim, Heather, and Julia decide to go in the pool. Deciding to not want to change into my bathing suit I strip down to my boxer briefs, I believe I danced around the room for a while and then went swimming in said underwear. Our night in the pool/hot tub was sadly cut to an end though when a security person (who I believe was a little slow so I named him Deputy Doofy) made us leave because we were too noisy and it was probably like 2 in the morning.
1,2 Step - Official song of spring break 2005. Heard many a times in Pleasure Island, and on the radio. I played it 7 times on my ipod on the trip home from Florida. Jazzy Fizzle.

On that note, I shall wrap up this edition of Spring Break SECRETS. Coming in the next edition: More velociraptors, teabagging, 17 year olds, and of course THE FINAL COUNTDOWN.

Sunday, March 13, 2005

Automatic, super-sonic, hypnotic, funky fresh blog entry:

So spring break 2005 has come and gone...and what a memorable one it was. So now it is time to let YOU the outsider get a feel of the tomfoolery and good times that occurred during the week. Since there's like 100 things I need to mention the "Spring Break SECRETS" will be revealed over the course of a few days right here on Kick Mad Blog...your resource for all things Velociraptor. So here are a bunch, not in any particular order. I know they probably won't be funny to anyone who wasn't there but to all my spring break peoples, I'm sure you'll enjoy. So without further ado here are a bunch:

The Chowder Fork - Steve ordered a nice bowl of clam chowder...and when finished we noticed a fork in his bowl. Apparently he didn't see the spoon behind the bowl and ate the chowder with a fork. It later inspired a setback team name.
Git R Done - Every rest stop on the way down to Florida had a whole section of Git R Done products.
The "Hitch" Shirt - So while in Disney World, we see a guy wearing a shirt that says HITCH...which I assume is a reference to the movie Hitch...found it hilarious for some reason that someone would wear a shirt that just says Hitch.
"How's Life?" - Reference to the frequent quotes used by Steve, asking people how they are and saying how he hasn't seen them in a while. A fan favorite.
Allan Houston Jersey -John O'Neill decided that the piece of attire he would wear most frequently (seemed like every day) would be the jersey of sir allan houston. Not a very funny thing, but I did get to wear it when I decided to stay in Florida an additional 2 days.
"Hey Chief" - More Steve stuff. While being blocked in by 2 cars, Steve yells "Hey chief" in order to try and tell them to move out of the way.
8 AM BBQ Chicken Sandwich - So the day we're leaving, we attended a Dennys. Due to my hatred of breakfast (not enough choices), I order a barbeque chicken sandwich at 8 am in the morning...I was mocked for doing so.
"Let's go get beer" - So we check into our hotel and turn on the Uconn game, sit there for about 5 minutes, until we decide it's time to go buy alcohol and order pizza, so then it was time to head to the store aptly named "Liquor".
Murph quits BP7...again - After heated arguments in the pool, Murph once again quits the intramural basketball team...ready to hit up the free agent pool for hired assassins.
Our Hotel TV - Ghetto ass TV would automatically go to full volume everytime it was turned on, and the picture would randomly get retarded, prompting us to hit it try to fix it.
Techno Larry - Just the name of some weird guy in the 70s/80s club at Pleasure Island who was all lit up and shit.
Launchpad - Me, Murph, and Tuba took a picture with Launchpad in Disney kicked ass.
Murph & the Tea Cups - So me and Murph go on the tea cups and I didn't want to spin so when he would spin it I would yell out and try to counter by spinning it back in the opposite direction. Murph laughed til he this day no one knows why.
South of the Border - Ok, so if anyone's ever been through North/South Carolina you're probably familiar with this. But there are non-stop billboards for 2 hours on the highway promoting this piece of crap establishment on the side of the road. Absolute bush league.
Assless chaps - Bike week in Florida during the week...many bikers had on assless was disturbing.
Ghetto McDonalds - Mcdonalds offers great deals so that when you buy 2 sundaes for 1 dollar each, you can get 2 for 2 dollars...oh and also by adding 1 penny to your order of a cheesburger, you can get any additional patty of meat.
Cherries Jubilee - Tenacious D skit reference...along with a SMALL seasoned curlies.
"What happens in Orlando stays in Orlando" - Well at least until I made this blog and said everything that happened down there.

Ok, well I think these posts are going to be boring reads for anyone not on the trip, but maybe some of you will get a laugh or two. Til next time, peace out!

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Alright well here's a quick little post as I don't want to start studying yet for my 2 exams tomorrow. Just finished up my sociology exam and think it went pretty well so hopefully tomorrow's won't be bad either, although that stupid motivation and emotion one will probably suck some balls. Not much new since my last post, just a whole lot of librarying. So essentially this is a post that is most likely unenjoyable to read, but a way for me to kill about 5-10 minutes. So yea, spring break in less than 48 hours...should be lots of tomfoolery. I plan on bringing boxcutters in case anybody wants to rumble. Speaking of rumbles, anyone wanna make bets on who throws down over the course of the trip? Ok well this post is trash, so I shall end it without wasting any more of your time. Back to hitting the books with a vengeance...peace!

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Well well has been a loooong time since this page has been active, I don't know why I'm attempting to put some life back into it, but hey who knows maybe it can manage a comeback. I'm also going to use this as a procrastination device for the next few days as I am dreading my Wednesday night midterm, followed by 2 Thursday midterms. So much crap to get through before the all important spring break trip (and NEW 1-hr arrested development sunday night). I'll kick it old school and use the old line by line random thoughts ish I used back in the day.

--i really hope that there's enough snow to cancel classes tomorrow and miraculously force one of my 2 midterms on thursday to be pushed back til after spring break...its possible right?
--riddles and jokes on popsicle sticks are fun for all ages
--new facebook pic up from saturdays party in which i of course had to remove my shirt
--speaking of being topless...having a bite mark on my shoulder may hurt my ability to "kick mad game" over better be gone by then!!!
--"dance contest winner" tshirt is on its way to me via e-bay...sadly i have no uconn games left to attend to rock it at
--paintman/painted kid is a huge loser (its science)
--my brother is the early frontrunner for funniest story of the year...if you havent heard it yet ask me about it
--im gonna start watching wrestling again for the next few weeks to get pumped up for the upcoming wrestlemania party
--I LOVE THE KNICKS...3 wins in a row is going to do nothing but make me assume they will win every game for the rest of the season
--i enjoy being president in asshole because i can make people say jumanji and hafta hold shit while they play
--someone tell these plows to go to bed and let the snow pile up on the roads
--theres no better gift than a playboy cover signed (on her thigh) by all of your closest friends
--my BP7 career is complete...kind of sad, but i feel i played my best ball in these last few games of the season and wish all of you guys the best of luck next year
--you go glen coco
--i think the blazer/t-shirt/bright orange hat look is going to start a fashion trend
--murph has the ability to correctly guess the first card i pick, and then the ability to not get another card correct again in his life
--willimantic is a fucked up town (FROGS!!!)

Alright well I don't really have much else to say. I don't know why I'm going back to using proper grammar, while ignoring it for the random stuff. Oh well. Hope you guys enjoy my first post back from the dead. Lata!